Melting into the soil

I apologize again for the inactivity here. 

  I know it's now summer. And when it's summertime, don't you just miss the cold cozy days sometimes? snuggling in your favorite sweater, drinking a cup of hot chocolate with its steam slowly hovering in front of your face and just the little chilly feeling and of course no more sweat to ruin your makeup of the day!

   The winter i miss the most is the after-snow days, when it isn't snowing but the snow hasn't melted away yet. I love the serenity of that. Not too crazy with the blizzard, everything's quiet and white. With that little blanket of snow covering the ground. Don't you just love it?

  I remember one day in winter, the snow storm has gone and the temperature actually went up a little. So, i, like a crazy teenager, wore a black skirt out to the city, without any leggings underneath. It was all fine until night came along. I stepped out of the LIRR train and walked to the bus station in my pair of snow boots.


Skirts and snow boots... what a combination right? I know. When the night has come. the chilliness actually rolled in. Literally, rolling into my skirt! Buses sometimes come right after the train's arrival, but sometimes, they come way early and guess what, we have to wait for like half an hour for another bus. That's actually pretty quick already. Let's not talk about to wait for a train for an hour!


   I hid myself inside the bus waiting area, which actually isn't really shielded and I was trying to keep myself warm by walking around.

    At last, the bus came and several students, like me, were lining up for the bus, trying to get away from the cold. From what i can recall in my memory bank, a black skin- color girl, with probably an Afro hair gestured me to go before her. She said, "You can go first. You are wearing a skirt!"  I turned to smile at her foolishly because i know right? What a brilliant wardrobe choice to go for. So i went before her and that little gesture and care still sticks to my mind today like a blanket of snow melting into the soil.

   Do you have any memory of a small kind act of others that still stick to your mind for a long time?


  

The best adventure is those that are unknown

 The great adventure finds you when you least expect it. And when they knock on your door, you have to have the courage to turn the knob. Either you take it, see where it takes you, or you stay on the same ground.

    My very first official audition in New York City was a moment i have been forever waiting for for months. The whole system is a bit complicated, most of them are not cattle calls and most of them are only asking for equity members, (let's not talk about the fact that i have to get up at 5am to take the morning train to the city). so basically if you don't have the card, you cannot go. So for weeks after weeks i finally could search one that i can go which was the Mary Poppins ensemble call. Interestingly, the call was scheduled on the day after a concert i had to attend. Which means, after a night of screaming, being in the snow (with minimal clothing as i wanted to look nice in the concert, um..) and not resting. There was no way i was going to skip the concert for this call so having my fingers crossed, i screamed in a special way in the concert and braced myself in the cold, somehow being too happy and excited and not sleeping until 2am and waking up at 7 (thanks god I was staying in the hotel about only 7 streets away) and somehow, spoiler alert, i managed to do my best.

 The best wasn't at Mary Poppins though. After having bananas, bread and cereal for breakfast, i grabbed myself a blueberry muffin from the breakfast counter and headed out for the day. When it was about 9 or 10, i waited in the area where the call was held. To my surprise, there wasn't many people but just around 3 girls in their dresses and a few guys who were stretching their legs in the open space, with their dance leg muscles sticking out and toes in their pointe.. As i was sitting on the bench and casually changing my winter boots to my heels, (i swear the girls were looking at my action..) i saw an old man went towards the room and before he went inside, he spent some time with us girls. We learned about he was the producer for the show, which i learned he was only a guy providing money for all of these and had almost nothing to do with anything else and most important of all, we were told they were not seeing anyone who were not on their list until those people who were are done, and it was still their decision whether more wanted to be seen so we were told to come around at 12 to only see their decisions.

   I turned to look at the other girls, 2 of them seemed to be friends and 1 were not, four of us haven't really talked with each other until then. So when the producer was away, we had come to an agreement that it was either you can stay here or just go and how it all explained why there were only so few of us here. What was in my mind was that there was no freaking way i was going as i have waited for this since so long ago. So with my bottom stuck on the bench as hard as glue, the two girls started to get change back to their winter clothes and got up. "I like your heels,", said one of the girls. To be honest with you, i thought they hated my heels and the way i changed it. So that compliment was really out of no where and made me surprisingly happy. "Thanks", i replied. "They are so pretty, i can never wear white heels, They are so easy to get dirty." Said the girl. And there, we started a short conversation about my heels.

    Just when they were about to leave, the two girls asked me and the other girl if we wanted to go to another audition.  We were a bit skeptical about that decision but since there was nothing we could do in that few hours, after several minutes of consideration, i decided to go with them, and the other girl did too. The funny thing was that i thought the other call was only downstairs so i didn't change my shoes back. But the truth was, it was 20 streets away. So not having to wear my boots back, i stumbled my way in the open air and took the subway with the 3 girls. I hate that i am not writing their names because i totally forgot them all. How i wish i remember them...

  Having absolutely no idea what the call/show is, where is it, what do we have to do, we just followed the girl who happened to receive the information on her phone and she also had no idea what that was about. So there we were, a fearless audition squad. During the whole 'trip' to another location, we managed to learn more about each other and one just randomly sing in the subway made me feel like i was in the sound of music or something. And i liked it.

   The train ride was quick, but long enough to form a new bond among us four. We then arrived to that small rehearsal place and a relatively rustic and plain one compared to the one we were in after climbing 2 floors of wooden stairs, squeaking as we went along. At last, we found the location, a rehearsal studio with pastel green and red tone style and some simple wooden setting. We settled in a small room with about 20 other girls in their dresses and were ready for any instructions.

(sobs . memories)

   I'm not going to talk about what details happened next but i really like to mention how our little squad stuck together in the corridor while waiting to be seen, (and that time a guys randomly did a monkey climb with his legs on both walls while waiting in line) and how during the day, we bravely and stupidly went to another audition with absolutely no information nor preparation together and somehow learning more about each other's story. And how i managed to do my first NYC audition. I did not care about what the show was, i sounded cool in the room, i have my people with me and i had the best adventure ever. Although the time was short for us (OH, and the one i got close with looked like a mix of the Old Miley Cyrus and Angie Miller, and i told her about that too), they were the people who made my adventure and made me feel like i was not doing it alone. That really made my first time a special one.

  Do you have any impromptu adventures that you dont know where it would bring you?
xx


  

How we see the world

 It has been such a long time for a post to emerge on this blog. Just like the long-awaiting anticipation for spring to finally crawl her feet into winter, when signs of leaves start to emerge from their bulbs, showing their little green heads on barren trees, when flowers begin to blossom in the cold, bringing in colors of hope and enlightenment. Spring to me has never been that exciting until now, specially when it can bring a little more energy and life to a white washed winter wonderland. I have been waiting for spring, that color, that energy since forever like you may have waited for this blogpost. or not...
 
   Speaking about the anticipation of spring, allow me to insert a little story here. I still remember how during a walk with a classmate to the mailroom after the acting class, we had to cross a parking lot area where the trees were still barren and only a few branches had signs of green bulbs. He was speaking something about spring break and said, "Everybody's going away, it's so dead here".Part of me understand what he means as it is the most isolated area yet you can call it a paradise in other way and everyone's dying to get away to have some fun. But i had to stand a different viewpoint from what he had said, simply because life is so much more than what you see, the trees, which little pieces of green leaves had been growing from the trees and every grass and every creatures running across the field has a life. Spring is coming, it's emerging, it has a life. Here i have to quote the lyrics from a song - colors of the wind:

   The earth is just a dead thing you can claim
   But i know every rock and tree and creature
   has a life , has a spirit , has a name 

  The point is, i have never truly loved spring until the spring in New York. Spring is so special here. with its huge contrast to winter and most importantly, my favorite part, every corner, every street is filled with flowers of different kind, tulips of different color, one of my favorites, daffodils, purple pansies... the city has never failed to amaze me how beautiful spring is, sometimes all you need is to stroll down the sidewalk and feel how much this city has offered you about the beauty of spring.

   One of the amazing flowers in spring has to be cherry blossoms. I have never seen so many pink flowers growing on a tree, let alone a line of them. Ah.. dont you love spring like that? From all white and barren to the color of the rainbow. Nature is such a beauty.

   So one day i decided to take a trip to downtown Manhattan, or you may call it the financial area where lies the Brooklyn bridge, the memorial, wall street etc.

    That sounded quite irrelevant but since the city basically plant everything in everywhere, of course cherry blossoms can also be seen in downtown as well.

    The day was bright and clear, Clear blue sky with some patches of clouds as soft as marshmallows filled the sky as quite and serene just like the mobile toys hanging above a baby's crib. When i was strolling around the financial area, not only was i able to see the skyscrapers, monuments but also all the flowers! I'm that kind of person who would spend 20 minutes to stay in the area of where it has planted flowers. Because tulips. my love.





 Moving on my trip, i stopped my pace in a small park, probably it was the city hall park, surrounded by some beautiful monuments,statues and pink cherry blossoms! It was so beautiful i had to linger around to take pictures for the next 30 minutes. During my shots, a lady with her sunglasses walked towards me and said, "can you help us to take some pictures? you look like you know what you are doing" Having heard that, i was more than pleased to help them because a) why not and b) someone is appreciating my photography skill. even just from the look of it. So after i took a few shots of them i asked if they liked them, they said yes and very unusually it was me who said thank you the first as i felt like oh my god you liked my photography (Even though she probably doesnt mean like that) She might not have seen it that way but me knowing her like the photos made me happy and i said it was also to thank her for believing me that i knew what i was doing with my camera. Plus the fact she did not go around to ask somebody to take the pictures for them again also made me content.

 

  Pictures are a way to show how you see the world, sometimes i want my photos to be taken like a certain way and i asked people to help and the result was different, to be honest, i was quite frustrated. Knowing not everyone would be interested in the art of photography, but rather just capturing people standing in front of something, it's okay. But sometimes i just wish more people would see every picture every frame as a form of art, not just a statement of who has been to where. And sometimes include a little bit of grass and flower in the frame because they also have a life. Appreciate every tree and every creature. And sometimes just communicate more to people around you, because if pictures cant speak for you, speak with others, appreciate what they are doing, even you don't really mean it, it can make a person's day. Because it did to me.



 

 

Walking history

  Just among the razzle dazzle theater districts, the tranquility of Chelsea and exotic West Village,
the skyscrapers of lower Manhattan and the luxurious uptown sophistication of the upper east and west stretches the beautiful, irreplaceable Central Park. Central Park was always a place i have dreamt of going, simply because i love nature and have never seen a park this big which covers a total of 4 avenues and 51 streets that takes you 2 hours to walk to the middle and back. At least that was the case for me as i stopped by every attraction.



  The amount of times i went to Central Park was massive. With a slow stroll along the roads with soft breeze blowing at your face under just the right amount of warmth of the sun, through the canopy of trees with streaks of sunlight shining through the gaps of the leaves and thousand lovely pink and white cherry blossoms, it always has been a chance for me to renew, to gain energy, a clearer mind and serenity. I don't know what it is but the park is so magical. Whatever hectic events you have in your week or day, you can just go through the buildings and walk straight into this fantasy garden and suddenly all the troubles you had just seem to gone with the wind and you start to appreciate the nature and wonder why everything is so beautiful. With all the greenery, the open space, the ever-changing seas of tulips, crocus and salvia at every corner of the park overlooking the skyline of the upper east and west side, I wouldn't want to be in any other place. I even almost cried one day in happiness when i was walking down the roads along the west side of the park with the song One Day by Lea Michele playing on my ipod, realizing the blue skies ever after and the one day was just now.

 And after many strolls, i decided to go there in my best dress to take some photos. The dress wasn't a casual dress you can throw on to any random occasion but maybe some cocktail parties and performances. It reminds me of fifth avenue and Breakfast of Tiffany because of its black and white pattern and the Tiffany blue belt. What's more perfect to wear in the park.


  Before slipping into my heels and begin the shoot, i walked around in my boots, spending some alone time in the upper west side of the park and wanting to take some photos of the buildings and the bridge. While i was walking past Bethesda fountain into a narrow road leading to the pond which lays the bow bridge, I was looking at some sort of flowers on my right and just so randomly an old man probably in his sixties walking his bike behind me asked if i knew what kind of flowers they were. Oh god, i didn't even know the names so i asked him back if he knew cause that was why he asked me the question right. Anyways, he replied no and thought i knew. I smiled and said i didn't and wished i did. Then the old man began to strike up a conversation with me about what i was doing there. It was nice to stop and i expected to chat with him for like 2-3 minutes, i learnt about he was doing his weekly work-out by biking around the park which sounded absolutely fascinating as having to bike in the park every week is purely a luxury. As i wanted to resume my walk and said goodbye to the old man, he asked if we could walk together as he too was heading towards. Of course i was a little startled by the idea as once an old man casually talked to me and asked me to sit down on one of the benches in the metropolitan museum of art and later asked if i could join him for a drink (well i talked to him at first as i thought he was a staff from the museum asking me if i liked the exhibition or not and guessed i was wrong, of course i walked away very quickly) So, this time, i was honestly a little scared.

   So there we walked towards the pond with the view of the bow bridge, the famous twin towered San Remo and the Dakota building (which John Lennon was shot there) adding grace to the skyline.

   The old man started to talk about these two buildings. It started to get a little interesting as he was literally talking about the architecture history in the 1920s in 1930s. I didn't know much about these two buildings apart from its association with John Lennon and Art deco and apart from they are equally beautiful. He started to explain what Art deco was and how it started and what type of material was used and there although i wasn't really paying full attention, i felt like he was a living history. So after another 3 minutes of history lesson, he kindly parted and resumed his biking workout and me? using the time to take photos of the buildings.

  The idea of wanting to tell me about the history of these two buildings and the style of architecture made me feel thankful afterwards. Well, not at that moment as i was still a little preoccupied with uncertainty of the situation. But now looking back, sitting on my cozy chair, i feel thankful for the walk of history and wished i was paying attention because no matter what information you find in the book or website, it cannot be compared to a real-time walk down the history.


- a family with an old person has a living treasure of gold -

Have you ever found wonders in old people?


Until next time xx